My Stubborn Will

If merely longing for change could make it happen, wouldn't that be wonderful? Yet, work is required to bring about the desired change. Work plus time plus resources plus self-discipline. And, most essential of all, God's guidance and help. 

As I reflect on the changes I'd like to experience, I realize that God does His part. He tells me in His Word what He wants me to be and do and how to accomplish that. Yet, even with such clear guidance, I'm still pretty much the "same ol' me" as I've been for years! I'm still struggling with the same unproductive habits: procrastination, excesses (weight, possessions, etc.), poor use of time, and so forth. I'm still longing for something to sweep over me and instantly transform me into what I should be--and want to be. I've been waiting for years for such a miracle.

But I'm beginning to understand that the changes I long for will not happen until I make myself DO what I know I should. That, Dear Reader, is called self-discipline. It's something I lack, as perhaps you do. Yet, it's essential if we are to follow God's guidance. He shows us what to do, but we are the ones who must do what He says. Otherwise, we'll never become all that He wants us to be, all that He will help us be.

As I said, God is faithfully doing His part. He's at work in me, causing me to will and to do His good pleasure. But I am unfaithful in doing my part. All too often, I refuse to make myself do what He says even though what He says to do is both right and beneficial. Like a pampered child, I sit back and wait for Him (or someone else!) to do my work for me. But that is not the way personal change will take place, is it?

O Father, help me to subdue my stubborn will that refuses to obey You. Help me to be able to say sincerely:

To listen to the song, click here.

In All Things

While praying for a dear friend’s four-year-old grandson who was in the Intensive Care Unit in a children’s hospital, I asked God to make Jax well and strong again. Then, I added, “If that’s Your will.”

As soon as I’d whispered those last four words, I wondered if I truly meant them or if I’d said them merely because I knew I should.

Immediately, I recalled these words from the hymn All the Way My Savior Leads Me: “For I know whate’er befall me, Jesus doeth all things well.”

Thankfully, I’ve known those words (written by Fanny J. Crosby in 1875) for many years and have often received comfort from them. For example, once when I was lying on a cold, hard table awaiting a frightening medical procedure that could lead to an even scarier diagnosis, those words, which I’d often sung in church, popped into my brain; and then I knew that whatever happened—good or bad (from the human perspective)—would be God’s will for me. I truly accepted that. Not a smidge of doubt. Only absolute certainty. 

Thankfully, all things turned out well. But if they hadn’t, I would have still believed that God’s way was best, that He knew what He was doing and why He was allowing certain things to happen.

I can accept God’s will for me, but find it harder to let God be God in the lives of those I love. Thus, when I prayed for the little boy, I so didn’t want to give God any leeway with the outcome. I truly yearned for Jax to be fully—and quickly—restored to health and had reluctantly added, “If that’s Your will.”

"O Father,” I prayed. “You have shown me again and again that You do ALL things well, even those that don’t turn out the way I hoped they would. Forgive me for doubting You in any way. Forgive me for failing to remember that You love this precious child, who is much loved and cherished and cared for by his family and friends, infinitely more than they do. Help my unbelief. Help me to fully trust You, even in this.”

And we know 

that God causes everything to work together 

for the good of those who love God 

and are called according to his purpose for them.

Romans 8:28, New Living Translation

Click here to listen to the Haven of Rest Quartet sing the song mentioned above:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BEOtFEs0Jos&list=RDBEOtFEs0Jos