Happy Faces. Happy Hearts.

 Below is the content of a blog post I created in June 2015. Enjoy.

Since childhood, I’ve known the song that says, “If you’re happy and you know it then your face will surely show it.”

I was reminded of that recently when I photographed children attending an event in our community. A few were “glum chums.” Others wore bland expressions. But some had such a radiance on their sweet faces that I was immediately drawn to them. They made my job easy, for I didn’t even have to try to coax a smile out of them. All I had to do was take the picture!

Regretfully, I failed to ask permission to post their pictures here. But if I could post them, you’d immediately see the HUGE difference a genuine smile makes. The eyes light up. The face is relaxed. There’s a warmth and a gentleness on it, which is so appealing.

So, I’ll post two photos: one of my Daddy, taken many years ago; and one I took of myself recently while seated near a window in our dining room. Like Daddy, I have a perpetual smile. Like him, I have a glad heart, even when life isn’t one big happy, happy. And, as the song says, the inner happiness (and joy, gladness, cheerfulness) shows up on the face.

A glad heart makes a cheerful face….

~Proverbs 15:13, ESV

Happy Father's Day

Happy Father's Day 

to all the dads 

who provide a good and godly example

for their children. 

The Mind-boggling Love of God

Sometimes we hear a truth that is mind-boggling, don’t we? For example, according to John 1:12, everyone who has received Christ has been given the right, the privilege, of becoming children of God. Imagine that! We are children of the Almighty God. Children of the One who made heaven and earth and sustains everyone and everything. Children of the One who loves and cares for us far better than even the best of the best earthly fathers ever could love their children.

And…the additional information provided in John 17:23 is also mind-boggling: He loves us as He loves His Beloved Son (Jesus), even though we are “messed up from the floor up.” Even though we break His heart when we ignore Him. Even when we fail to return His love. Even when we sin greatly (and often!) against Him, as well as others.

The Reality of His Love

Can you comprehend such love? I can’t. But it’s a reality for it’s mentioned all throughout the Bible. For example, Romans 5:8 says, “God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Yes, God loved us before we had even tried to get our lives “together.” As 1 John 4:10 (NLT) says, “This is real love—not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son as a sacrifice to take away our sins.”

The Eternality of His Love

God won’t stop loving us—no matter what. He said, “I have loved you with an everlasting love; therefore with lovingkindness I have drawn you [to Myself]” (Jeremiah 31:3). Centuries later, the apostle Paul wrote this in a letter to the Christians in ancient Rome: Nothing shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. To expound upon that truth, Paul mentioned several strong forces that try to separate us—-but cannot. For example, tribulation, distress, persecution, and other things that involve great suffering and grief. True, such difficult things can cause us to doubt that God loves us. But even if we doubt or distrust God—or become angry with Him—He continues to love us and care for us despite the emotional distance we place between ourselves and our Father.

An earthly picture of our heavenly Father’s love is found in the parable Jesus told about an earthly father and his prodigal son. Despite the son’s rejection and the rebellion and other unwise decisions he made, the father continued to love him and to long for him to return home. And when that son finally came to his senses and headed home, his father welcomed him with open arms. (Read Luke 15:11-32.)

The Joy of His Love

Knowing that we are fully loved—and fully known—brings inexpressible joy to our hearts even though others may not love us—or even like us. When we believe that He loves us, we can endure loneliness, aloneness, mistreatment, misunderstandings, rejection, and much more. We can smile (through our tears) and lift our heads, knowing we are greatly loved children of God.

May you and I rejoice in His abundant, constant, and eternal love every day.

In Praise of Mama

My sweet mama died years ago. Even so, I think of her many times each day, especially on her birthday (September 24th). Although I can no longer visit her or give her a gift or even call to chat a bit, I yearn to honor her in some way.

As I thought about what I could do, a familiar verse (Proverbs 31:28) from the Old Testament came to mind. Although the words stored in my memory are from the King James Version (the translation Mama and Daddy used), I also like the words from modern versions that express how I want to honor Mama on her birthday. For example, 

Therefore, I want to use written and spoken words to say I do love Mama, and that I thank God for choosing her to be my mama.

Although she wasn't financially well-off like the woman described in Proverbs 31, Mama did many of the same kinds of tasks she did. For example, she got up early every morning to cook a hot, country-style breakfast on the wood-burning cookstove. She took good care of our family and the farm animals and the garden that provided much of our food.

Mama didn't weave and spin like the Proverbs 31 woman did, but she sewed pretty dresses for my sister and me whenever she had enough money to buy fabric and buttons and lace. She also made beautiful quilts from scraps of outgrown clothes and fabric leftover from sewing projects so that we could stay as warm as possible on cold winter nights in our drafty, uninsulated house that was heated by the living room fireplace. Her stitches were so even and tiny that some folks thought they'd been done on a sewing machine.

Like the Proverbs 31 woman, Mama spoke words of wisdom and was kind to everyone. She had a gentle and quiet spirit and bravely accepted each hardship without complaining.

For these reasons and for the innumerable other ways she showed her love day after day and year by year, I want to take this opportunity to publically praise her and to say, "Mama, you are still much loved, much cherished. Although you are gone from my sight, you'll always remain on my mind and in my heart."

Bittersweet

 Mother's Day is bittersweet for me. How is it for you?

I'm missing my own precious mother, who departed this life eleven years ago. I'm missing my sweet mother-in-law, who was like a mother to me. She left us on Mother's Day weekend six years ago. I'm rejoicing in my two daughters and their families who bring me such joy (and call me "Nana"). I'm feeling thankful for all the good and godly women who have  "mothered" me in ways too numerous to mention. 

As I searched the Internet for a poem to share with you, I came across several that impacted me, including the two below. Then I remembered one I'd written about my mother in 2006 but hadn't shared with you. 

As you read the poems below, I encourage you to find a way to express the thoughts in YOUR heart. Write them out. And, if you feel comfortable, share them with someone else as a gift from your heart to theirs. But even if no one sees your words except you, expressing your feelings will be cathartic--better than a session with a therapist! Even better: always do as Psalm 62:8 says, "Pour out your heart before God." He loves you. He hears you. He will help you.

https://rachelwojo.com/a-prayer-to-empower-moms-3/

The following is an excerpt from a poem written by a mother's son as he imagined what she would say and feel as she coped with his death. The link below the excerpt contains the entire poem, a letter he wrote to his mother, etc. But even if you have time to read only this portion of the poem, I'm sure you can feel the bittersweet emotion it expresses.

But I will speak their names to my own heart
In the long nights;
The little names that were familiar once
Round my dead hearth.
Lord, thou art hard on mothers:
We suffer in their coming and their going;
And tho' I grudge them not, I weary, weary
Of the long sorrow - And yet I have my joy:
My sons were faithful, and they fought.

https://www.irishamericanmom.com/the-mother-by-patrick-pearse/

Wonderful Names

“If I’d known what my children would be like once they were grown, I could’ve chosen more appropriate names for them,” she said.

Although that’s true, none of us have that kind of foreknowledge, do we? Thus, we simply choose a name we like or one that’s been in the family for generations or one that’s the same as someone we admire. Sometimes we create a new one.

However, some parents mentioned in the Bible were told. For example, an angel appeared to aged Zacharias to tell him he and his wife Elizabeth would have a baby and that they were to name him John. (That name means “Jehovah [God] has been gracious, has shown favor.”)

An angel also appeared to Mary, a young virgin, and said to her, “…you will conceive in your womb and bring forth a Son, and shall call His name JESUS.” (A name derived from the Hebrew name Yeshua, which means “to deliver, to rescue.”)

Jesus’ life matched the meaning of His name. He did deliver us from our sins and rescue us from being cast into Hell, forever separated from the One who loves us more than we can conceive.

He also lived up to another name given to Him centuries before His birth: Immanuel. That name, which means “God with us,” refers to not only His deity (God) but also His identification with and His nearness to mankind.

As Henry Barraclough’s beautiful hymn (1915) says:

Out of the ivory palaces

Into a world of woe

Only His great eternal love

Made my Savior go.

He came down to us in order to provide the way for us to go up to live with Him throughout all eternity. In the meantime, we who know Him can come to Him with our praises, with our gratitude, with our confessions of sins, with our pleas for help, with our brokenness, with our….

Because God the Father knew exactly what His Son would be and do, every name He chose for Him is appropriate, each one describing who He was and is and forever will be. 

Oh, blessed be every name given to our wonderful Savior and Lord!  

Note: A longer version of this was published in the Chapel Hill News and Views magazine in December 2019. 

Set a Good Example!

Day after day, I observed a mama and daddy bird bringing bugs to feed their four hungry baby birds in the nest on our porch. Every time I looked out the window, I’d see one of the parents sitting on a post watching expectantly for an unsuspecting bug to fly by, or I’d see a parent swoop in—bug in mouth—to feed the young ones.

As human parents, we understand the struggle to provide for our offspring, don’t we? We know about the extra—often difficult—things we do in order to meet the needs of those in our care. Although we’re often worn out from working so hard to provide what our children need, we continue to do all we can for them. That’s what loving parents do!

Soon the day comes, as it did for the bird family, when the young ones leave the security of the nest and enter the adult world. Hopefully, they will thrive there. And when it’s their turn to parent, they’re likely to follow the examples we set for them, examples of faithfulness, kindness, dependability, loyalty, love....

And children do model what they’ve heard us say and seen us do. Although some children will behave dramatically different from their parents, most usually follow the example Mom and Dad provided for them. Scriptures such as 1 Kings 22:51-53 (below) confirm that.

Whether we realize it or not, we are constantly imprinting our attitudes and actions on others, especially the younger generation whose minds and hearts are as easily molded as Play-Doh.

May God help us to provide good and godly examples.

Ahaziah the son of [King] Ahab began to reign…
He did what was evil in the sight of the LORD 
and walked in the way of his father 
and in the way of his mother [Jezebel]…
[Ahaziah] provoked the LORD, the God of Israel, 
to anger in every way that his father had done.

1 Kings 22:51-53, ESV

No Greater Joy

Both my daughters have careers that involve working with people all day long. Since they live and work in counties outside the one my husband and I live in, I rarely know any of the people in their workday world. Yet, I like hearing the gist of some of their experiences.

I’m always thankful to hear about situations that went well for my daughters. But even when they talk a bit about some of the difficult people they’ve had to deal with, I’m always thrilled to know about those times my daughters responded rightly (that is, in a Christ-like manner).

Upon hearing about such situations, I immediately think of what the Apostle John wrote in a letter to “the beloved Gaius.” 

After hearing that Gaius was “walking in the truth,” John said, “I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth” (3 John 1:4).

Yes!

Tough Love

Reflecting on the years she had children to care for, the guest on a radio program said, “I grew tired of struggling to get the children up, fed, dressed, and out the door on time for school. So, one Christmas my husband and I bought alarm clocks for each of them and said, ‘It’s your responsibility to get yourself up and to come to breakfast cheerily.’”

She didn’t say how that worked, but I’m assuming it did. If so, I’m sure everyone in that household felt less frustrated without the constant naggings that used to go on and without the frenzied rushes to get out the door. 

I wonder how that would have worked if Mama had given my sister and me the responsibility for getting ourselves up and to the breakfast table cheerily. I wonder how that would have worked if I had tried it with my own children. (One took responsibility for her wake-up schedule without being told; the other was more like me and required lots of trips to her bedroom door and lots of loud commands to “Get up NOW or you’re going to be late!”)

The earlier the children learn to take responsibility for their actions, the easier and quicker they learn that actions/decisions have consequences as well as rewards. The earlier they learn to face those consequences, the quicker they learn to collect what they need before heading out the door. For example: Forgot your lunch??? Too bad!

I never felt I could be that tough with my children--or grandchildren. No matter what they did (or didn’t do), I felt compelled to come to their aid. I thought that’s what loving parents did. But child-rearing experts recommend “tough love,” which requires parents to say, “I love you too much to allow you to continue behaving that way.” Now I see that nipping bad habits in the bud early on is much easier than trying to instill good habits in older children.

Tough love is painful for children and parents. Yet, it brings great rewards.  Even the Bible says so. Take Hebrews 12:11, for example, which says: Now no chastening [discipline] seems to be joyful for the present, but painful; nevertheless, afterward it yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it" (emphasis added).

Note: We can also apply the "tough love" principle to ourselves!

A Parent’s Delight

To wish her son a Happy Father’s Day, my friend Betty posted (on Facebook) a picture of him and his daughter. After describing Jeff as “the best father a child could have,” Betty concluded the message by saying, “We love you,” something she and her husband had surely said many times to Jeff.

I commented immediately, saying, “What a thrill to see Jeff and his daughter!!! I’m so happy he’s such a wonderful dad—but I am not the least bit surprised that he is. I wouldn’t have expected him to be otherwise. Please tell him hello for me and that I am so proud of him.”

I haven’t seen Jeff since he became an adult, but I remember how he delighted me when he was one of my third grade students. He never gave me one minute’s trouble. He was diligent, well-behaved, always prepared, polite, kind…Thus, I was not at all surprised to hear he was a wonderful dad. 

As I thought about Jeff and his proud parents, I recalled what the Bible says about a son (or daughter!) who turns out well.

The father of a righteous man has great joy; 

he who has a wise son delights in him. 

May your father and mother be glad; 

may she who gave you birth rejoice.

~Proverbs 23:24-25, NIV.

Pray for the Children!

Several years ago, while listening to Elisabeth Elliot's radio program, Gateway to Joy, I heard her quote one of Amy Carmichael's poems. I loved the poem, found it on the Internet, and learned that it was included in the book, Toward Jerusalem, which is a collection of poems by Amy. But the poem Elisabeth quoted is one of my favorites.

The poem is actually a prayer Amy was praying for the children under her care at the Dohnavur Fellowship (a refuge for underprivileged children) in South India when Amy was a Protestant missionary there from 1895 until her death in 1951. It's one of the sweetest prayers I've heard for children. 

Copyright restrictions prevent me from sharing the entire poem, but I can share a summary of her thoughts. She asked God to protect them from the powers of evil, which can pull them down--like whirlpools and/or quicksand do. She asked God to guide children through life's troubled waters and to cheer them in the midst of life's battles. 

There's more, much more, and Amy expressed the deep desire of her heart far better than I can summarize. I encourage you to buy the book and/or click here to read the poem (it's the third one) and then offer her words as your prayer on behalf of all children.

Thou Knowest

During a phone call with a dear friend I hadn't talked with in several months, we updated each other on the careers and locations of our children and grandchildren. I could scarcely believe the diversity represented in their lives. Hers lived in different states and had a wide range of careers. My grandchildren, who are younger than hers, are still in school, yet also have a wide array of abilities and interests. As always, I was amazed by all that because I still picture her children and my daughters the way they were 20 plus years ago--still in school and/or just entering the work force. Those children are now parents of children who are as the parents were in what seems such a short time ago.

As I reflected on that, I recalled a prayer I'd heard recently.  (See text on photo.)

Those ancient words express far better than I ever could the prayer of my own heart regarding myself. And if I paraphrase it slightly, I can also pray it on behalf others, including my children and grandchildren, as well as those of my long-time friend: "Jesus Christ, Lord Almighty, Who didst create them and redeem them and hast brought them now to that which they are, Thou knowest what Thou wilt have them to be. Deal with them according to Thy lovingkindness and show them Thy mercy, Lord. Amen."

In All Things

While praying for a dear friend’s four-year-old grandson who was in the Intensive Care Unit in a children’s hospital, I asked God to make Jax well and strong again. Then, I added, “If that’s Your will.”

As soon as I’d whispered those last four words, I wondered if I truly meant them or if I’d said them merely because I knew I should.

Immediately, I recalled these words from the hymn All the Way My Savior Leads Me: “For I know whate’er befall me, Jesus doeth all things well.”

Thankfully, I’ve known those words (written by Fanny J. Crosby in 1875) for many years and have often received comfort from them. For example, once when I was lying on a cold, hard table awaiting a frightening medical procedure that could lead to an even scarier diagnosis, those words, which I’d often sung in church, popped into my brain; and then I knew that whatever happened—good or bad (from the human perspective)—would be God’s will for me. I truly accepted that. Not a smidge of doubt. Only absolute certainty. 

Thankfully, all things turned out well. But if they hadn’t, I would have still believed that God’s way was best, that He knew what He was doing and why He was allowing certain things to happen.

I can accept God’s will for me, but find it harder to let God be God in the lives of those I love. Thus, when I prayed for the little boy, I so didn’t want to give God any leeway with the outcome. I truly yearned for Jax to be fully—and quickly—restored to health and had reluctantly added, “If that’s Your will.”

"O Father,” I prayed. “You have shown me again and again that You do ALL things well, even those that don’t turn out the way I hoped they would. Forgive me for doubting You in any way. Forgive me for failing to remember that You love this precious child, who is much loved and cherished and cared for by his family and friends, infinitely more than they do. Help my unbelief. Help me to fully trust You, even in this.”

And we know 

that God causes everything to work together 

for the good of those who love God 

and are called according to his purpose for them.

Romans 8:28, New Living Translation

Click here to listen to the Haven of Rest Quartet sing the song mentioned above:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BEOtFEs0Jos&list=RDBEOtFEs0Jos

His Life Is Love Expressed

One year as Father’s Day was approaching, I began to observe the fathers around me. I saw them coaching Little League teams. I saw them heading off to work in order to provide for their families. I saw them helping their children and/or grandchildren with all sorts of projects. I saw them caring for their parents. I saw them having dinner with their wives. I observed them bowing their heads and giving thanks for the food they and their families were preparing to eat.

            

Observing fathers as they served their families and fellow citizens in various ways brought to mind the words on this plaque one of my daughters gave her dad on Father’s Day many years ago, words descriptive of him then and now.

           

I have no idea who wrote those words, but they certainly apply to many dads. I, for one, am very grateful for those men whose lives are “love expressed.” I pray that their children will notice their dad’s quiet sacrifice and realize how blessed they are to have (or to have had) such a wonderful dad.

I’m also aware that not all dads are as described above. But the children of dads who mistreated them and/or abandoned them can also take comfort in this great truth expressed again and again in the Bible: We have a Heavenly Father who loves us far more than even the best of earthly fathers ever could.

            

David certainly found that to be true in his life. Again and again, like a wonderful father, God came to his rescue. God forgave him. God gave him extraordinary opportunities and blessings. Throughout David’s life, God talked with him and listened as David talked to Him. All that (and much more) prompted David to describe God as a “Father to the fatherless, defender of widows…” (Psalm 68:5).

            

Jesus also often reminded His followers that God was not only His Father but theirs, as well. For example, when Jesus was teaching His followers how to pray, He taught them to address God as “Our Father in heaven” (Matthew 6:9).

            

And in Luke 12, Jesus assured His followers their Father would most surely provide for them. “Don’t worry about money and possessions! Your heavenly Father already knows your needs and will give you all you need from day to day—if you make the Kingdom of God your primary focus!”

           

Not only will our Heavenly Father supply all that we need for day-to-day living, but it gives Him great happiness to do so! (See Luke 12.).

How blessed we are to have such a Father!!! And if we’ve also been gifted with an earthly father whose life is “love expressed,” well that’s, as a dear friend and neighbor of ours often said, “Doubly good. Doubly good.”

© 2012 by Johnnie Ann Burgess Gaskill. Scriptures quoted are from the New Living Translation.

Life Is...

Life is an opportunity, benefit from it.

Life is a beauty, admire it.

Life is bliss, taste it.

Life is a dream, realize it.

Life is a challenge, meet it.

Life is a duty, complete it.

Life is a game, play it.

Life is costly, care for it.

Life is wealth, keep it.

Life is love, enjoy it.

Life is mystery, know it.

Life is a promise, fulfill it.

Life is sorrow, overcome it.

Life is a song, sing it.

Life is a struggle, accept it.

Life is a tragedy, confront it.

Life is an adventure, dare it.

Life is luck, make it.

Life is too precious, do not destroy it.

Life is life, fight for it!

~Mother Teresa

This is one of my favorite photos of two of my grandsons having fun in the Fall leaves many years ago. I remembered it as I was reading Mother Teresa's words (above).

Children as Kites

Note: A friend e-mailed me the following article, attributed to Erma Bombeck. I regret that I do not know where the words were published because I would love to give proper credit. I took the photos on March 13, 2011, at the annual kite flying event at the University of Georgia Research and Education Garden in Griffin, GA, a beautiful garden that is open to the public. Free admission.

Children as Kites . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Erma Bombeck "I see children as kites. You spend a lifetime trying to get them off the ground. You run with them until you’re both breathless…they crash…you add a longer tail…they hit the rooftop…you pluck them out of the spout. You patch and comfort, adjust and teach. You watch them lifted by the wind and assure them that someday they’ll fly.

"Finally they are airborne, but they need more string and you keep letting it out. With each twist of the ball of twine, there is a sadness that goes with the joy because the kite becomes more distant, and somehow you know that it won’t be long before that beautiful creature will snap the lifeline that bound you together and will soar as it was meant to soar…free and alone. Only then do you know that you did your job."

Kindred Spirits

As soon as I read on http://www.betterphoto.com/ that “kindred spirits” was the theme for that month’s photography contest, I began thinking about photos I might take in order to have some that would fit the theme. In previous contests, such as "gold" and "bliss,"I submitted photos I already had on hand. But my supply of “kindred spirits” photos was woefully lacking. I did find one I’d taken of my two oldest grandsons having a grand time playing in the leaves last year. But that was the only one I thought I could enter.

So, while my husband and I were on vacation in Prince Edward Island, Canada, I often said, “Remember, I need a ‘kindred spirits’ photo!” Since he knew what I liked to photograph (churches, flowers, horses, lighthouses, barns, etc.) and was willing to pull over so I could snap such pictures, I encouraged him to help me spot “kindred spirits” photos.

One day as we were leaving the northernmost tip of the island, I noticed two horses in a pasture right beside the road. “Pull over!” I said. “Those horses will make a great ‘kindred spirits’ photo.”

But when James parked near the fence, the horses were too apprehensive to hold their heads close together, as they had been doing when I’d first spotted them. However, they soon relaxed and renewed their focus on each other, so I snapped photo after photo until I finally got one that I was excited about.

Several miles down the road, we stopped at Northport to photograph a lighthouse. As we strolled on the pier, I saw several cormorants sitting on the edge. Two of them were sitting fairly close to each other. But as I snapped photo after photo, they moved even closer together. The perfect shot came when they turned to face each other, their beaks only a short distance apart. “What a sweet pose!” I said. “You look like you’re best friends!”

I didn't know if my photos would receive awards, but having to photograph an abstract concept like “kindred spirits” made me do a lot of thinking.

“Kindred spirits” calls to mind the close kinship two people have with one another. Perhaps they enjoy the same kinds of things, feel similarly about certain matters, and/or share common goals and dreams. Some “kindred spirits” could even order from the menu for the other person or go shopping for him or her, for what one likes the other does, too. They often exclaim, “You sound just like me!” or “That’s just what I would have done!” Or they might say, “We’re two peas in a pod, aren’t we?”

Jesus spoke of that kind of kinship when He said to His disciples, “He who has seen Me has seen the Father! Even the words I say to you and the works you have seen Me do have come from the Father. For I am in the Father, and the Father is in me.” (See John 14.)

Truly, the relationship between the Father and the Son epitomizes “kindred spirits.” But guess what? Jesus also said, “If anyone loves Me, he will keep My word; and My Father will love him, and We will come to him, and make Our abode with him” (John 14:23, The New American Standard Bible). We, too, can become “kindred spirits” with them and with fellow believers!

©2007 by Johnnie Ann Burgess Gaskill. For permission to use, please contact her.